The therapeutic process involves a journey of exploration into the vast terrain of emotions, beliefs and hidden fears. It takes courage, curiosity and gentleness to bring the light of our awareness and the warmth of our compassion into places that hurt. When we open our hearts to the places that are painful, a synthesis of healing can occur. We then discover a more brilliant and alive self and an awakening within our hearts; a call to live life freely and fearlessly.
Contemplative Psychotherapy
I was trained in Contemplative psychotherapy at Naropa University in Boulder CO. Contemplative psychotherapy brings eastern Buddhist philosophy of human nature to Western psychology. Its basic assumption is that true and meaningful healing and transformation happens in the now. A contemplative psychotherapist works in the moment supporting the client to bring awareness and compassion to their present experience of themselves. Accessing who they are in the moment helps clients unhook from past experiences that are causing unnecessary suffering and facilitates an opening to bring renewed clarity to themselves and to their lives. Contemplative psychotherapy is rooted in basic core principles.
Our true nature is basically healthy and good. At the core of who we are is a gem of brilliant intelligence and goodness. This core gets diluted with negative self perceptions and conditionings of who we are. Accessing this core self happens when we touch into our basic experience of ourselves in the moment with kindness and curiosity without trying to change, fix or manipulate. When we access our basic goodness, our experience is of great joy and fulfillment.
Sanity and Insanity. Contemplative psychotherapy views that the core of who we are is sane. While we can find ourselves amidst great confusion and feelings of insanity, moments of sanity are always available. This comes from the notion that who we believe ourselves to be is not fixed or solid. When we drop this fixed notion of ourselves and open to the moment with curiosity and kindness we can have profound moments of sanity and awareness.
Awareness and compassion are seen as two wings of a dove. By allowing our minds to expand with curiosity and our hearts to open to our basic experience we enter into a fuller sense of being.
Self-acceptance. A tremendous amount of suffering occurs when we do not accept ourselves and our basic experience of being. We are often bombarded with our likes and dislikes which generates a constant push and pull of trying to get things to work out our way, and pushing away discomforts and that which threatens our security. This push and pull keeps us bound within a constant unrest as well as a sense that there is never enough or something is never ok. Self acceptance means allowing this moment to be enough, which means that who we are can be ok no matter what emotion we are feeling or how uncomfortable things can feel at times. Self-acceptance creates space where there is room for creative exploration and joyfulness of being.
Healing occurs by not changing or fixing who we are but by shifting our perception of ourselves. Western psychology models strive to fix the symptom, but often the core root of suffering is created by how we perceive ourselves. When we judge and criticize who we are, when we have difficulty accepting who we are, we have turned against ourselves and as a result unnecessary suffering is created. Questioning these core negative beliefs and turning towards ourselves with kindness is the beginning point of integrating back into the wholeness of being. In rediscovering this core self by opening up to our experience without judgment or shame, transformation and healing naturally occur.
Mindfulness Technique. There are mindfulness techniques to help access a whole sense of being where we feel connected to our sanity and core self. The main technique involves unhooking from the constant reel of thoughts, images and stories that fill our mind. By unhooking and witnessing ourselves in this very moment with mindfulness, we begin to relax with who we are and open to what this moment has to offer. We begin to discover our aliveness, creativity and vitality.
As people conditioned in Western society, we habitually become fixated on the content of thoughts that our mind produces. It is much like getting hooked to the TV screen and becoming absorbed by the constant sequence of images and dramas. We too often experience and identify ourselves with the content of what the mind produces. However, just like TV, much of what our mind produces is noise that is filling up space, entertainment full of colorful drama. We forget the room we are sitting in, the experience of being a part of our environment that is holding us. When our focus is on our thoughts, it encompasses our experience. Where we put our focus is where we put our energy. Shifting our focus is the first step to unhooking. We have the power and choice in every moment to shift our focus from our thoughts to being in our bodies, and the environment that holds us. Our greatest anchor to the present moment is our breath. It is the life force that sustains us and nourishes our cells. Shifting our focus to the breath we shift ourselves to being in the moment. We begin to notice the sounds and smells, the sensations of our body. Thoughts continue to arise but it becomes like background noise, much like a TV in the background that is being noticed but not watched. Shifting our focus is changing a lifetime habit, yet the benefits are profound and life changing.
The mind is vast and profound. Not only does it generate thoughts, but also encompasses tremendous intelligence and awareness. While our bodies only grow to a certain point, the potential for our consciousness to grow and expand is infinite.
“You are sitting on the earth and you realize that this earth deserves you and you deserve this earth. You are there – fully, personally, genuinely.” -Chogyam Trungpa